Four financial conversations for every couple
By Lis McNealey Davies, CDFA
Owner, Financial Advisor
Our team member Brooke recently got engaged, and we’re all thrilled at the office! Hearing the details of this new chapter for her reminded us that while planning a wedding is exciting, preparing for a life together is even more important.
As someone who has experienced both marriage and divorce, I know firsthand that life doesn't always unfold exactly as we expect. One lesson I've learned through it all is that open conversations about money are some of the healthiest investments of time a couple can make.
Finances remain one of the most common sources of stress in relationships. In fact, research has consistently shown that money is among the top issues couples argue about.
That’s why prioritizing financial conversations is so important. Whether you're dating, engaged, newly married, or have been together for decades, these conversations can help strengthen both your financial future and your relationship. Here are my four recommended topics to discuss, in no particular order.
What does financial security mean to each of you?
We all have different experiences with money, and those experiences shape our habits and priorities. You should ask each other questions like:
Understanding each other's perspectives creates a stronger foundation than simply agreeing on a spending plan.
What is your current financial situation?
Trust begins with transparency. Before combining your lives, it’s very important to have an honest conversation about your financial picture, including:
What are your shared goals?
Whether you're dreaming about buying a home, traveling more, starting a family, retiring comfortably, or caring for loved ones, identifying your shared priorities is important. Having this discussion can also help you assess if there are areas where you are not aligned and give you the opportunity to talk through those together.
Your goals will evolve over time, and that's normal. The important thing is continuing to revisit them together.
How will you two communicate about money?
Consider setting aside time each month or quarterly at a minimum to check in on your goals, upcoming expenses, savings progress, and any financial concerns. These conversations don't need to be formal. They simply need to happen consistently.
Every relationship is different.
Having conversations about money with the person you love helps you build the life you want together. Some couples combine everything, while others keep finances separate. Many find a balance of the two. There isn't a single "right" approach. What matters most is creating a plan that reflects your shared values, encourages honest communication, and helps you move confidently toward your goals.
If you'd like an objective partner to help guide those conversations, our team is always here to help.
Lis McNealey Davies is owner of The Arlington Group Investment Consulting. A leader in the female focused financial advisory niche, Lis builds upon the group’s strong foundation and core offerings to drive growth and champion the group as an emerging advisory company in the divorce, widowed and life transition niches. As a previous divorcee and mom to three wonderful daughters, Lis understands firsthand the importance of financial confidence.
Owner, Financial Advisor
Our team member Brooke recently got engaged, and we’re all thrilled at the office! Hearing the details of this new chapter for her reminded us that while planning a wedding is exciting, preparing for a life together is even more important.
As someone who has experienced both marriage and divorce, I know firsthand that life doesn't always unfold exactly as we expect. One lesson I've learned through it all is that open conversations about money are some of the healthiest investments of time a couple can make.
Finances remain one of the most common sources of stress in relationships. In fact, research has consistently shown that money is among the top issues couples argue about.
That’s why prioritizing financial conversations is so important. Whether you're dating, engaged, newly married, or have been together for decades, these conversations can help strengthen both your financial future and your relationship. Here are my four recommended topics to discuss, in no particular order.
What does financial security mean to each of you?
We all have different experiences with money, and those experiences shape our habits and priorities. You should ask each other questions like:
- What makes you feel financially secure?
- What are your biggest financial concerns?
- What does financial independence look like to you?
- What are your hopes for the future?
Understanding each other's perspectives creates a stronger foundation than simply agreeing on a spending plan.
What is your current financial situation?
Trust begins with transparency. Before combining your lives, it’s very important to have an honest conversation about your financial picture, including:
- Income and career goals
- Savings and investments
- Debts
- Spending habits
- Other existing financial responsibilities
What are your shared goals?
Whether you're dreaming about buying a home, traveling more, starting a family, retiring comfortably, or caring for loved ones, identifying your shared priorities is important. Having this discussion can also help you assess if there are areas where you are not aligned and give you the opportunity to talk through those together.
Your goals will evolve over time, and that's normal. The important thing is continuing to revisit them together.
How will you two communicate about money?
Consider setting aside time each month or quarterly at a minimum to check in on your goals, upcoming expenses, savings progress, and any financial concerns. These conversations don't need to be formal. They simply need to happen consistently.
Every relationship is different.
Having conversations about money with the person you love helps you build the life you want together. Some couples combine everything, while others keep finances separate. Many find a balance of the two. There isn't a single "right" approach. What matters most is creating a plan that reflects your shared values, encourages honest communication, and helps you move confidently toward your goals.
If you'd like an objective partner to help guide those conversations, our team is always here to help.
Lis McNealey Davies is owner of The Arlington Group Investment Consulting. A leader in the female focused financial advisory niche, Lis builds upon the group’s strong foundation and core offerings to drive growth and champion the group as an emerging advisory company in the divorce, widowed and life transition niches. As a previous divorcee and mom to three wonderful daughters, Lis understands firsthand the importance of financial confidence.